Living in South Africa

Being South African has many stereotypes to it. Many people still have a preconceived notion that "Africans" are; 

• of one race; 
• hunter/gathers who run around in loin cloth; 
• poor, disease infested and uneducated people. 

While Africa is not a country and most of us do not live in a jungle and ride elephants and lions to where we need to be, some stereotypes do hint and give a glimpse into our reality.

Born and raised in South Africa, I will give you my first hand experiences and thoughts about "Living in South Africa".

I was born in the year 1992- which was 2 years prior to the final conversion of South Africa from a Parliamentary Sovereign Republic to a Constitutional Democracy.When I fill in school/ university/ medical aid/ voting/ bursary etc. application forms and I am asked to "tick off" my race, to which I respond as "coloured" (having "mixed race parents"). 

I was born in Johannesburg but grew up in Cape Town. I spent most of my life in the suburbs of what I will referred to as "previously advantaged areas". According to the standards of the general population of this country, my family is classified as middle class. Being in a family of 4 (in a household of married parents and two girls) I grew up in a very sheltered environment with my sister. Upon reaching the age of approximately 13/14 I became more aware and exposed to the country I lived in. 

The "over protectiveness" of my parents over my sister (who is 3 years younger than me) and myself is debatable. Upon the usual "don't talk to strangers" we had another rule book to abide by. We were forced to wait within the perimeters of our school gates until our lift home arrived. We were not even allowed to go home with family members or family friends if our parents did not previously tell us that they specifically were coming to fetch us (which says nothing about their character but says tons about our environment). When we each started high school (at 13 years old in Grade 8) we were no longer allowed to attend "sleep overs" and had a curfew of roughly 23:00-00:00. We were never allowed to do homework or go to parties at friends houses that our parents had not yet met the parents to. We had various bands on social media sites and cellphone applications (which has now been removed upon convincing and proving the safety thereof).

At 18 and 21 years old, today, we are still not allowed to go into our back yard unless our parents are at home (which we have on occasion snuck out ,in immense fear of being caught and scolded, on hot days to swim or to play with our dogs).

On top of this, I have personally never been dropped at a shopping center and left on my own. I have ALWAYS been escorted by my father to my friends or where I needed to be safely. I have never taken a jog down my street or walked to cafe around the corner on my own. I have only been in a taxi/taxi mini bus as an infant with my grandparents (to be taken to the day-hospital when I needed treatment) and NEVER again. I have never been on a public train or bus.

While some of these "boundaries",shall I call it, may be reasonable and others not, within the vicinity of the Western Cape (ONE out of 9 provinces in South Africa) -where I live; news of school children having sex in the local shopping center bathrooms (being video recorded and photographed); children being raped by family members, family friends and strangers alike; a university girl going missing and discovered dead in a vacant field; a young girl being raped and her body mutilated by someone she possibly knew (and other accomplices); among other stories is part of our daily news reports (among these horror stories are stories of gang violence, murders and drug related crimes). For as long as I was aware of the world, such stories riddled my local newspapers, television and radio new reports. 

The most disgusting, distressing and somber part is that these stories are not "breaking news" or an "outrage" that lasts more than a few days at most. This is news that after a day is "old news" or is buried 8 pages into a magazine or newspaper after "breaking celebrity news", political qualms, police fraud and corruption is addressed. And in other non-related news, every few minutes someone is being raped

I am lucky enough to say that I have live a sheltered life; which some might say is a bad thing but given the circumstance I would disagree. Although I have not had any bad experiences of being robbed, rapped, abused or anything of the sorts, I am aware of my surroundings and I know my boundaries and I will forever be "rather safe than sorry". I will not be Superwoman and get into a taxi by myself to some place, be it another town or down the street. And while that may be to some people a luxury, an adventure or a mundane activity of getting to work or to school, to me it is an inevitable death sentence. 

While living in South Africa is not all "braais", beaches, rugby and embracing our diversity. Being realistic, it is a place where being a women is one of the most fearful things you could imagine.

Me with Table Mountain in the background. 

I can only but thank my parents for the life they have afforded me given the circumstances. I am fortunate enough to have graduated high school with a bachelors pass and to currently be in my third year of studying at Stellenbosch University. I am eternally grateful for all they have done for me and my sister and for that which they continue to do.

If you want to ask any questions or hear any embarrassing stories of my "over-protective" parents, let me know in the comment section below :).

PS. these are just MY thoughts and experiences.